The Most Epic Blanket Fort and the Nerdy Love Story That Made It So

Love, InshAllah's avatarLove, InshAllah

Ali Nhu An Ali & Nhu-An’s engagement photo

This fall, Nhu-An and I are getting married.

We’ve been together since November 18, 2000, back when we were seniors in high school. Despite a lot of obstacles like living on opposite sides of the country for much of our relationship and the glacial pace at which I completed grad school, we’ve stayed together and continue to be in love. To celebrate our engagement, we made this epic blanket fort.

Here’s the nerdy story that made all of this possible.

A nerdy love story

Nhu-An and I were very different people when we met. She worked hard, wanted to make a big difference in the world, and kept thinking about the next big thing. I only cared about enjoying the present moment with my friends and family. That’s why our senior class voted me “most likely to be out of class” while Nhu-An was “most…

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Update & Few Tips on Health & Beauty

Hey readers,

Hope your Summer is going well!  Life is going great (VERY rare for me to admit) so far this year- it may be my best yet!  I don’t think the 25 y.o. me would recognize the person that I’ve (slowly) become. The confidence factor is key, I feel, b/c I didn’t have much of that as a younger person.  I may be unusual, BUT I think life really starts after age 30.

As you may have noticed, I was VERY busy from mid-March to early July, esp. w/ work.  I have a different role (but w/in the same company); it’s been a BIT of a challenge (at times), and also a GREAT learning experience.  I have MORE to learn, I’m certain.  Since I took on this role, I’ve learned more about my company and dealt w/ many people (including consultants and partners).  I really enjoy that aspect (now); as an older teen/young adult, my part-time jobs helped me slowly get out of my shell and not be fearful of strangers. 

Thanks for reading!

EMMA

HEALTH TIPS:

Don’t worry about your looks; worry about your health.

Don’t only change for men, you have to be healthy for yourself.

Above are two of my mom’s fave sayings; I’ve been hearing them over the years.  I must add that my mom has ALWAYS been a moderate eater.  She doesn’t believe in diets, fads, or even spending 2 hours ea. day at the gym; her chosen exercise is walking and yoga.  After several  years of yoga, Mom branched out to Zumba and few other aerobic classes at her (no-frills) gym. 

The few other South Asian women at her gym were happy to see a friendly face; exercise is not often at the top of  our lists.  We want the younger gen to have their heads in books.  (Sidenote: If you can read on treadmill, then you’re not going fast enough.)  Most desi kids, even in the US, don’t grow up playing a sport, which can be benefit when they get older.  Now, we don’t need to be GREAT at sports, but why not attempt it more often?  My little brother and a 2nd (girl) cousin are the only ones I know who played sports after elementary school age.

If you want to lose weight, cut down on the following foods:

  • Bread (white) – I can’t even recall when I ate white bread; I like flatbread now. 
  • Candy/Desserts – We now know that (a BIT) of dark chocolate can be good for us.  However, the I feel that MOST of the US indulges too much in sugary foods.  We must (slowly) train ourselves to get out of the habit of turning to sugar; try some different fruit instead (if available).  Save desserts for rare/special occasions. 
  • Pasta (white) – I used to be a BIG fan of pasta, but rarely eat it now.  Wheat pasta is not bad tasting, IMO. 
  • Potatoes – I eat potatoes RARELY; I do like fries.  Mom suggests baking sweet potato fries; she did that before it became popular.
  • Rice (white) – This is a tough one for me (as well as MANY South Asians)!  Since I hate brown rice, I choose couscous instead.  My family liked brown rice, for the most part.  Good for them!
  • Soda (esp. dark-colored ones that are worse for health and teeth) – I have a love of Coke (trying to cut back to once a wk); Mom does drink Sprite and Ginger Ale (on rare occasions). 

The BEST tip- don’t beat yourself up for having a bad meal… or even a bad day! 

BEAUTY TIPS:

I don’t like that stuff [makeup].

Don’t use so many different brands. 

These are my mom’s thoughts on beauty.  Everyone says that Mom has natural beauty.  Growing up, she would use Ivory soap, Oil of Olay (face cream), and Ponds (face cream for the Winter).  On rare occasions, she would (reluctantly) put on some eyeshadow and lipstick.  Things that looked fake were NOT for her; the inner self was reflected by her outer self.

Is Mom’s idea of staying as natural as possible old-school?  Hmmm… maybe not!  After all, many of us see more breakouts when we use foundation.  And NOT all mascaras last ALL day; it’s not good for Spring allergies either.  Many surveys have shown that a clear, fresh complexion will get you noticed than ANY type of makeup.  I feel that makeup is good for dates, weekends, and special occasions.  The key is to know your skin type, what colors suit you, and how to apply the makeup.  I suggest talking w/ a few makeup artists (Ulta, Sephora, etc.)- they can guide the total newbie (like I was a few yrs back).

 

The Lunchbox (2013) starring Irrfan Khan

Viewer comments:

…this gentle and thoughtful director shows human nature running a very natural course.

It had humor, seriousness, lessons, insight, beauty, love, family, decision-making, sadness, reflections, invisibleness, self-doubt, invention, perseverance, respect, aging, determination, coming to terms when enough is enough and genuine affection in how feelings grew by words alone…

lunchbox_kitchen

Here is the perfect film (from a first-time director) for smart/sensitive viewers who want an alternative to Bollywood.  Neglected middle-class housewife/mother, Ila (Nimrat Kaur), yearns to win back the attention and love of her husband Rajeev, one of the many strivers in the new India.  Rajeev barely looks at Ila, is glued to his cell, and often comes home late at night.  With the help of her (unseen) upstairs neighbor, she creates delicious (vegetarian, as she’s Hindu) recipes, and packs them in his tiffin (lunchbox). 

lunchbox_rdng

This lunchbox is supposed to be picked up each afternoon and delivered (via rickshaw, truck, and bus) to his office.  However, it goes to a Sajaan Fernandes (Irrfan Khan from The Namesake, Life of Pi, etc.), a lonely/Christian government accountant just a month away from retirement.  He likes the food, so an empty lunchbox is delivered back to Ila.  Feeling appreciated, she decided to write him a thank-you letter. 

lunchbox_train

The two lonely people begin a correspondence, bringing (much-needed) hope and optimism into each other’s lives.  They share thoughts in their letters that no one else knows, from the mundane to the deeply personal.  Are they just pen pals?  Or is there possibility for more?   

lunchbox_wedding

Saajan is dreading retirement, and postpones the training of his replacement, Shaikh (Nawazuddin Siddiqui), a younger Muslim man eager to learn/succeed. I enjoyed the slow reveal of Shaikh’s life- he’s got a fascinating story under that big grin.  His character’s struggles and yearnings embody that of many modern, urban men.  Siddiqui (still in his 30s), played a pivotal role in Midnight’s Children, and is an actor to watch.   Nimrat Kaur is very easy to relate to; I’d never seen her before.  She had a make-under for this role; she’s a very glamorous woman in real life.  Irrfan Khan continues to (quietly) create magic- he simply becomes the character!  He still has a long career ahead (only in his mid-40s).  This  is a must-see!